


The Women Of The War

by Arcpowered



Series: The women: [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Dark Hermione Granger, Death Eater Draco Malfoy, Death Eater Hermione Granger, F/M, Flashbacks, Melodrama, Rough Sex, Soft Severus Snape, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:54:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25444249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arcpowered/pseuds/Arcpowered
Summary: After 4 years in Azkaban, Hermione Granger is reflecting on the decisions and actions she took. Was everything worth it and what has her husband been hiding.Are the choices you make along the way the correct ones to make, and where is the line between good and evil?-EDITED; 31.12.20-
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger/Severus Snape
Series: The women: [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1842913
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16





	1. Fear me not

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to note; this work is probably going to change in rating depending on if I’ll be writing the ‘devils tango’. Constant swearing throughout.  
> This chapter is dedicated to Finn

May 2002

In reflection, I acknowledge that my actions probably deserve no atonement. That every decision I made in the name of saving the world, saving Harry, were miscalculated and misguided. I’m not sure when I started making the wrong decisions but here, I am, sitting in Azkaban, waiting for my trial to begin. The trial to determine if my marriage supported the dark lords' campaign. Maybe It did. They certainly believe that the marks on mine and my husband's arms are proof enough for life sentences.

But what do they know really? Certainly not the inner workings of my marriage. They believe they know my role in the war, my role as the traitor. The one passing information to the death eaters via my husband. But like all things, appearance isn’t a reliable source for reality. I long for silence. But I know it's not coming. I’ve been here for four years as it is. They are putting off my trial. At least that's what the lawyers and Harry have said. Not enough evidence for a conviction, according to Harry, but enough to keep me here. Every time they say that I know it means they haven’t found him yet. Him being my husband of course. I hope they don't find him.

I see the pleading in Harry's eyes to give up his location so that they will acquit me. He doesn’t understand that his children aren't motivators to give him up. I may love them with all my heart, Jamie with his ginger curls and brown eyes and Albus with his dark wavy hair and Harry's eyes, but it's not enough to give him up. If I remember correctly Ginny is pregnant with their 3rd child, a girl. I’m sure I'll receive a photo when she arrives.  
Harry has to wait until Ginny isn't at home to send letters and photos. Not that I'm surprised. I wouldn’t want my husband to talk to me either. Not that I've spoken to my husband in four years. But I suppose that's what I deserve for assisting in the murder of Ronald Weasley.


	2. The beginnings of the mistake

Sept 1996

I will fucking kill Lavander, was my first thought as my eyes fluttered open. The girl had decorated the dorm in balloons and streamers. Turning 18 shouldn’t have to come with this level of celebration, I thought bitterly.  
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY HERMIONE” screeched lavender.  
“Yes, thank you lavender” came surprisingly nicely out of my mouth. I would love to tear the bitch limb from limb right now.  
“Everyone's waiting for you downstairs, that's where all your presents are as well” rattled on Lavender “it's a shame it's a Thursday though, imagine having Snape and Slughorn on your birthday. I think I would kill myself!”  
I rolled her eyes at the girl's apparent concern for her classes, whilst vaguely registering the fact Lavender forgot that I also have arithmancy. The girl was still rambling on as we descended the stairs into the common room. We were greeted with cheers and a banner reading ‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY HERMIONE’. Harry, Ron, and Ginny rushed over to give her hugs and celebrations.  
“Happy Birthday” bellowed Ron right next to her ear. I wanted to scream. Well because she wanted coffee first, but she still wanted to scream. She knew she should be grateful for the attention she was receiving but honestly, she just rather be in class or studying in the library.  
The independent Project I was working on, which was combining the disciplines of potions and defence against the Dark Arts, would have to wait today I thought bitterly. Oh god, Snape would be less than impressed by this as he read any distraction to her work ,especially when Harry was involved, to show her lack of commitment despite his tutelage.  
When Snape had sent a letter to inform me that I would be taking an independent study with him along with Draco, I was very confused. Personally, I had been hoping to be picked to do the charms and transfiguration study with McGonagall but Padma and Ernie had been chosen instead. However, it wasn’t all that bad, it was incredibly clear that Snape had a unique knowledge of both subjects and provided insight into how to use the disciplines to complement each other, something very few teachers seemed to want to do. Working with Draco wasn't half as bad as she expected it to be, however, the fact he had suddenly become withdrawn and secretive raised concerns. I knew Harry believed him a death eater, but I just couldn't see it. What did Voldemort have to gain from having Draco, a school-aged child within his ranks? He didn’t even turn 17 until June.  
I became vaguely aware of the fact they were pulling me down to breakfast, Ginny was telling me about the party they were planning for Friday night and how I would need to find a way out of my private lesson with Snape. I just sighed, nothing short of my death would get me out of that lesson, not that they could ever appreciate that. Well, they didn't really appreciate much outside of quidditch and drinking, did they? I thought bitterly. I can’t really blame them, I mused, outside of studying what did they want a school full of teenagers to be doing. The lake was too cold to swim in, and unless you enjoy walking the grounds provide no entertainment.  
I slid onto the bench opposite Harry and Ron and next to Ginny, I registered the fact Luna was sat next to me on the other side. Luna placed a small package into my hands “I made it over the holidays, I thought it may come in useful” she said in her usual distant manner. I carefully unravelled the brown paper and a dainty silver chain dropped onto my lap. I turned back around to thank her, but she had already drifted away from the table muttering about Dumbledore being infested with nargles.  
Suddenly the owls carrying the morning news and letters swooped into the great hall, my copy of the daily prophet arrived first, along with presents from my parents, the Weasleys and Remus. Apart from 'potions and their application in the defence' which I was happy to receive from Remus, my presents were money (my parents were prone to giving me obscene amounts of muggle money to compensate for the drift in our relationship) and the usual Weasley jumper with a big H on the front. I sighed. Despite having not eaten anything, I was going to be late for arithmancy at this rate. I always looked forward to Thursdays, the last day of each week I can devote to study before I'm demanded to be with people all the time. I placated the pleas to stay just a bit longer ‘to celebrate’ before I hurried out of the hall, my watch telling me that its 8:57, which infuriates me further. My birthday had thrown my perfect routine out the window, and I'm yet to fucking eat. Why is turning 18 such a massive deal anyways, it's just another step towards death. I finally arrive at arithmancy, the class of six is always quite regardless of the task. My desk is still empty, one of the positives about a class of six is fact I always get a full desk to myself next to the wall. Professor Vector doesn't seem fussed by my late arrival to the class and actually congratulates me for turning 18. I could happily kill myself right now. As I settled into my chair and pulled my notebook out to complete the work set, I contemplated the opinion Snape will give me regarding the book from Remus. He would certainly inquire as to where I got it from. Would it be better to lie to him or tell him the truth? He will likely be condescending regardless. My thoughts drift to what me planned thesis will be for the project, unsure if my focus should be on the potential redevelopment of the polyjuice potion or an attempt to create a shielding potion. My musings on what my project will be come to an abrupt halt when I realised everyone was packing up for break. The rest of the day passed relatively quickly and before I knew it, it was time for defence. As much as I love Harry and respect Snape the constant stream of insults and snipes at each other drive me to the point of insanity. I just wanted to learn not to listen to arguments constantly. Defence against the dark arts was definitely a fuller class, and yet I still managed to sit on her own. Snape began his lecture on how to cast non-verbal defence spells and why they were important in a hostile situation. And yet I could hear the whispers between Ron and Harry. The universe was really asking her to fucking murder, someone.  
“Mr Potter, would you like to share your conversation with the class?” hissed Snape once he had concluded his sentence.  
The whole class steadied itself for what would be the usual bickering between the pair.  
“No not really” retorted Harry. I took a sharp breath inwards; I just knew he had secured a week's worth of detentions and loss of house points.  
“20 points from Gryffindor Mr Potter, you will remember that I do not have to keep you here in this class, you are no longer a first-year Potter.” drawled Snape. The Gryffindors in the room looked affronted by this as if Harry didn't deserve the point loss.  
Snape resumed his lecture whilst sweeping around the room to ensure everyone's notes were up to standard. As usual, Ron's where not.  
"Mr Weasley, must you grace this classroom with your obvious disdain for the subject. I think detention with Mr Potter to re-do this abysmal work is in order don't you?"  
Ron went scarlet at this but made no effort to retort. Perhaps he is learning something after all , I thought bitterly. Jesus, I really needed to stop having such negative thoughts about my friends, even if they really did cause their own trouble. As four o'clock drawn closer, Harry and Ron's eagerness to leave the classroom grew exponentially. They had already packed up at 3:55, something Snape didn't comment on, He was probably happy to see them leaving his presence. As the clock struck 4 and the class fled the room Snape called out "A word please Miss Granger". Harry and Ron gave me worried looks and asked if I would like them to stay with her. I found it ridiculous they could face actual death eaters, but I couldn't be alone with Snape. But then Harry and Ron weren't known for their intelligence and common sense. Once I had finally managed to shoo them from the room, with promises I would meet them in the common room Snape turned to look at her and cast Muffliato.  
"Miss Granger, I would like to pass on my good wishes for your recent birthday. I hope you will act sensibly this weekend." drawled Snape "however, I have something of importance to request from you if you are willing to hear me out." 

"Miss Granger, I would like to pass on my good wishes for your recent birthday. I hope you will act sensibly this weekend." drawled Snape "however, I have something of importance to request from you if you are willing to hear me out." I looked at him as if he had just grown two heads. “As I'm sure you're aware, the order of the phoenix has suffered a… blow… since Blacks death.” I nodded at this statement, headquarters had been moved to the burrow of all places as until Harry was of age, they couldn't secure the house against Bellatrix and Narcissa. “I’m sure your also aware I am a member of the order.” I nodded again. “Well then Miss Granger, the headmaster has decided I need your assistance in monitoring Draco Malfoy and ensuring he is successful in his attempts to end the headmaster's life, whilst also keeping Mr Potter safe away from Malfoy and keeping me informed about Potters' movements after Dumbledore has fallen” I attempted to keep the outraged look of my face “Miss Granger get that ridiculous expression off your face. Why do you think you are taking the Potions and Defence project with Draco? You know full well the headmaster chooses which students are worthy of such guidance. Me and the headmaster intend to utilise you to keep contact between me and Potter when the situation arises that you cannot reside in this castle. Miss Granger, it's imperative you agree to my suggestions. Should Draco succeed in his task, unaided, he will unleash terror within this school which we must prevent whilst securing the headmaster's downfall.” I blinked for a few seconds, “Why is it imperative that the headmaster must die professor?" I asked meekly. “Because he's already dying Miss Granger, and if I'm not in a position to intervene Draco will be the one to kill him, despite the headmaster's request I am to be his executioner” he replied tersely. “Why me out of everyone? Surely asking a Slytherin to do this job will be more helpful. They know him already and have reason to talk to you” she questioned tentatively “Because Miss Granger, you are eighteen whilst also being a student making you the only order member to be able to take on what Dumbledore is going to ask of you” “But I thought it was you proposing all the… duties my role will entail beyond helping Harry” “Quite Miss Granger. Unfortunately, that isn't enough for Dumbledore. The headmaster is going to ask you to marry me, with the end result hopefully being your acceptance into the Dark Lord's ranks. You see Miss Granger; he's going to ruin my connection to the Order and replace me with you. Your position to Potter makes you a perfect candidate to ensure that he defeats the Dark Lord by having a unique insight into the movements and decisions of the Dark lord regardless of where you are. The Headmaster intends to make you a spy's wife.”

****

I slowly made my way back to the common room. My head was spinning from what Snape had said, what Dumbledore had made him ask even. Dumbledore. I needed to speak with him, to confirm the truth in Snape’s request. It wasn’t that I didn't trust him, it was more the fact I couldn’t believe Dumbledore would ask that of her, or of him come to think of it. I sighed in exasperation for what felt like the 100th time that day.  
I could hear the sound pouring out of the Gryffindor common room, in ‘celebration’ of her birthday. These people really don’t accept it’s a Thursday evening do they.  
As I entered the room a large cheer erupted around her. A glass of firewhisky was shoved into her hands by a seventh year.  
“TO HERMIONE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY” Bellowed Ron as the Gryffindors downed their shots. I realised there was definitely going to be no sleep tonight, not if Ron and Ginny could get away with it. Resigning myself to my fate, I took another whiskey.


	3. The Potion Masters Weakness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW- self harm, murder and rape  
> Hi dudes, okay so basically to clarify some points raised by some of you:  
> 1- Hermione is in Azkaban for a multitude of reasons, The character is however trying to gain sympathy. As you read this fic it would be lovely to know your opinions on Hermione’s and others actions.  
> As for does hermione’s husband love her, I’m not sure to be honest. I haven’t really decided but it isn’t going to be an important factor within this story (I’m trying not to spoil it for you guys!) 
> 
> Anyways here’s some insight into snape’s mindset and some Hermione/Draco for y’all. I would love to hear from you guys :)

He watched her retreating form disappear from view. He'd seen the range of emotions flash across her face as he told her the Headmasters plans. The fucking headmaster. The girl was little more than a child and he wanted her to sacrifice herself in the name of the good. What the fuck even is good these days. What does that make me? he thought bitterly. He fucking hated the headmaster for asking him to utilise children in such a way. She wasn't even an order member yet, it wasn't like she could waltz into meetings and feedback her findings. Maybe that's what the headmaster wanted, the fucking bastard. 

His thoughts wandered to his Godson, the child he had raised as his own. The child that was paying for the mistakes of his father, and yet he knew Potter believed he’d joined willingly. What child would join willingly. Especially after seeing the horrors Draco had over the last year. Keeping Potter from ruining Draco's plan was a non-negotiable, he didn't need the situation Draco was being forced to create to explode exponentially. 

Severus refocused his attentions on the stack of third-year essays on the identification of werewolves, the fucking dunderheads couldn't even manage a simple essay though, could they? Nor could they write it to the correct length. Great, fucking Monday night detentions for the lot of them. Not like I have anything better to do with my life he thought bitterly. 

He fucking hates this job, he thought. Which job, he wasn't sure. He hated the idea he was practically securing the deaths of at least three students. His masters' reliance and manipulation of children to achieve their wishes made him nauseous. They had only just sat their OWLS for fucks sake, and there's already one death eater. He had known the tide was changing ever since the dark lord had returned, but to brand a child? After what happened with Black? His thoughts drift to the bottle of ogdens in his bedside table. What he would give to succumb to the lifting feeling of intoxication. And yet he still had a job to do. Report to the headmaster.

***  
Severus looked at the headmasters' fragile form slumped back into his chair. His heath seemingly deteriorated by the day. And yet he was still meddling in affairs.  
“Good evening Severus. How did your discussion with Miss Granger go?”  
“What do you think?'' She's a child Albus, whose been conditioned to believe in the arbitrary lines of good and evil”  
“Now now Severus, am I to believe the girl doesn't trust your word” questioned Dumbledore “miss granger is a -”  
“I know what Miss Granger is, Albus. I've had the displeasure of teaching her for the past six years. The girl is an open book, Albus! I could see the mistrust in her eyes when I proposed your ideas to her, how would you react if-” snapped Severus  
The headmaster sighed.  
“I shall speak to Miss Granger, Severus. Explain enough of what the war requires of her-”  
“Requires her Albus ?! she's a child who should have no involvement in your meddlings”  
“Severus we both know she is no child. I will speak to Miss Granger, Severus. In the meantime, I trust you have the Draco situation under control?”

***

A single tear slid down his face, they asked him to educate these children and then secure their destruction. The daily prophet came in each day reporting on the murders and rapes of students families, ex-students, nameless muggles. He was being made to watch the systematic destroying of the young people he was meant to protect. Lifting the bottle to his mouth Severus took a large swig, and let out another sob. 

He thought of all the people who he’d known as kids, even the fucking dicks in Gryffindor house. The fact that out of everyone he allows himself to remember, it's Lupin and Peter that are still in sound mind struck much deeper then it should. Lily’s dead body lying on the floor is an image that has been seared into his mind ever since. Lily, the girl who’d sacrificed herself for her child despite knowing her husband lay dead at the foot of the stairs. Lily, the childhood friend who had died believing her son would soon follow her. Lily, who would rather die than live with the guilt of breathing without her husband and child. What he would give to be Lily. Idolised and loved. Dead and trouble free. 

He’d never forgive the headmaster for making him the evil teacher. He cared more about the children residing in this castle then Dumbledore could ever claim too, despite what he made them all believe. and yet it isn't over yet, was it. He was still being forced by both sides to secure the destruction of Draco's soul, still being forced to make sure Potter is willing to give himself up as a pig for slaughter, still being forced to use Granger as a tool to secure his position as a spy. 

Another sob rocks his body, the reality of the situation he was in is always lingering. Being the perfect spy was a role requiring a strong lack of emotional reactions. Caring about the children, the victims had always been a flaw of his. Every time he ended a life or raped a woman, he would add a cut to his right arm. He needed to remember each one somehow. He needed to remember how many before they all became one event. He needed to remember how many he had destroyed at the orders of the dark lord, to please the headmaster. The dark lord's belief that giving him red-headed muggles as his prize for good behaviour made Severus want death to reach him. 

And yet here he sat on his bathroom floor, sobbing for the people he couldn't save. Sobbing for the people he can’t save and sobbing for all those he broke. Picking up his razor, he cuts a single deep line through his right forearm just below his wrist. He watched as the blood slowly oozed out the self-inflicted wound. 

“For Miss Granger” he whispered quietly as another sob came out. 

***

Climbing out the portrait hole was harder than usual for Hermione. Maybe she was a lot drunker than she thought she was. How many drinks had she had again? Merlin, I fucking hate myself sometimes. When Ginny and Dean had slunk off together around midnight, Hermione realised she was alone in the common room. Harry the oblivious sod had gone to bed hours ago taking Ron with him. She sighed. You wouldn’t have thought it was her birthday. Hermione knew that there would be no prefects or teachers out this late at night, and honestly even if there was she was fairly sure she could wrangle her way out of any serious repercussions. 

As she turned onto the transfiguration corridor she noticed someone slouched on one of the benches in the courtyard. Their platinum blonde hair was illuminated by the pale moonlight. Sighing, and praising myself for the fact I can travel without creating noise, I made my way towards where the boy sat motionlessly.  
Draco turned to look at her, his face was still but his eyes had this empty emotionless look to them that made me feel uneasy.

“What do you want granger” whispered Draco  
Well, I certainly have no good answer for that. I looked at him again and after coming to the conclusion he was unlikely to do anything to cause harm, I sat next to him. His gaze moved towards his shoes.  
“Is everything alright Malfoy?” I asked tentatively.  
“What do you think granger. Why do you care anyway” he replied tersely  
“I'm not sure I do Malfoy, but it's three in the morning. It's not like I have any other options for company, and by the looks of it neither do you. So is everything alright Malfoy?” 

Silence passes for a few moments, she could hear Draco's irregular breathing next to her. And then a tear slid out of her eye. The boy next to her just looked so defeated, so broken.  
“It was my birthday yesterday” I started tentatively “they apparently wanted to celebrate but yet again I was left alone, sometimes I wonder if being the person I am is really worth it”  
Draco looked at me with shock,  
“So you and potter aren’t shagging then?” he asked with a hint of amusement in his voice  
“no, we aren’t Malfoy. Harry, well Harry only has eyes for Ginny and me, well Harry just isn't my type” I replied wearily.  
“I Wouldn’t have guessed. After your behaviour in fourth year, I just presumed you’d whore yourself out for any quidditch player who asked.”  
I could see a level of confidence and amusement reach his eyes  
“Well, at least I'm not shagging pug-face” I replied mockingly.  
Draco let out a small chuckle, “Trust me, Granger, I would rather kill myself than sleep with Pansy again”  
“Again? Merlin Malfoy the fact you shagged her once is bad enough” I replied with a hint of humour lacing my voice.  
“Maybe your right granger, I suppose sleeping with Krum was probably the best thing that's ever happened to you” he retorted  
“What can I say Malfoy, he was a good shag”  
“Yea? What constitutes a good shag for you then granger”  
“Why do you want to know Malfoy? Want to know for future reference?”  
The second those words slipped out of my mouth I knew I had fucked up. A mixture of emotions ran across Draco's face as he looked into my eyes as if to determine my motives. 

And then, suddenly, his lips crashed into mine. His right hand pulled my cloak in an attempt to bring me closer to him. I allowed him to slip his tongue into my mouth. He was kissing me with a passion I had never felt before. Its intent to dominate set something inside of me alight. Maybe it was the alcohol or the cold, but I was suddenly kissing him back. Sliding a hand onto his chest- 

Draco pulled backwards, removing his hand from her robes. He glanced at her hand on his robes as if she was going to set him on fire.  
“What the fuck you mudblood whore” he sneered “ you disgusting bitch, kissing me like some harlot”  
I looked at him in shock, unsure of what to say and how to react to the situation.  
“No wonder nobody likes you when you're so fucking easy”  
Tears threatened to spill from my eyes. I knew it was illogical to actually listen to what he was saying. He knew where to strike to hurt me the most.  
“Huh granger, you fucking mudblood. One day your kind won’t be around to whore yourselves out”  
I studied his eyes to try to find any clue as to what has caused this sudden change in attitude but they had returned to the dark emptiness as before. Looking at me in disgust he sneered and took off in the direction of the dungeons. Once I knew he had gone I began the journey to my bed trying to hold back the tears. Why must people be so uncaring? Maybe Malfoys right about me not being liked. She doubts anyone even noticed she's been gone. 

As I reenter the common room and ascend the stairs to my dorm, I survey the damage created by last night's festivities and realise it would be happening all over again tonight. Sometimes I really wish for death. 

Once I finally sink into my bed, I feel the exhaustion take my body and my eyes flutter close in an attempt to get enough sleep to be awake for breakfast. But like everything for Hermione she wasn’t going to get that wish.


	4. To steal a wizards heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning:  
> Sexual content.  
> So for anyone who doesn’t want to read this chapter  
> \- Hermione is yet again late for lesson  
> \- Draco asks For Hermione’s help  
> \- snape approves of Hermione’s actions towards Draco

“Miss Granger don’t you look beautiful tonight” Snape whispered into her ear, “I wonder who you are dressing up for”  
I sighed as he slowly kissed my neck and placed his right hand on my waist.  
I moved my left hand to his chest in an attempt to bring him closer to me, his scent driving me crazy.  
“Now now Miss Granger, desperation is hardly a good look” he muttered against my collar bone. His hands had found their way to the zipper of my strapless dress which he promptly unfastened. My dress fell away from my body exposing my breasts. Snapes left hand went to my pert nipple, pinching it between his thumb and index finger electing an involuntary moan from my mouth.  
Chuckling to himself he returned the attention of his mouth to my neck, kissing and biting in a slow deliberate manner. My brain had gone into overdrive, trying to process the sensations his actions were causing.  
His tongue suddenly swirled over my right nipple, causing a low-pitched whine to escape into the room. I faintly recognised the fact my breathing had become more laboured as Snape used his right hand to guide my hands to the buttons on his shirt. In my lust dampened brain, his shirt came off in mere seconds.  
I looped my hands around the back of his neck bringing him closer to breasts. I was vaguely aware that he was pulling my dress down to my ankles revealing my lacy black panties. Pulling away from me to take in the sight of my nearly naked body, snape smirked.  
“Over the desk, Miss Granger” came silky out of his mouth whilst his hands darted to my hips to turn me round in the direction of his desk.  
I tentatively made my way to the front of the desk and was struck suddenly with fright  
“Bend over Miss Granger” he stated.  
Feeling the urge to comply, I pushed my reservations down and allowed the upper half of my body to rest face down on the cold wooden desk. From somewhere to my left, I heard the sounds of his belt unbuckling and his trousers being removed.

The room was silent minus my laboured breathing; Snape was somewhere in the room, but I couldn't decide on where.  
The seconds became minutes, and my brain began to question just what was happening.  
“Miss Granger, that lacy underwear is very promiscuous for a schoolgirl don't you think” his voice was coming from behind her.  
“Yes sir” I muttered  
“It's almost like you intended to be my entertainment for the evening miss granger” I recognised the humour in his voice.  
His hands came to rest on my hips again his fingers curling to be under the scrap of fabric providing me with my last shred of modesty. The slow descent of my underwear down my legs was practically torture, the desire for his cock to be buried in me growing with every passing second. I could sense him bending down to remove my panties from around my ankles.  
“Spread your legs for me” was uttered so quietly I would have missed it had I not been devoting all my attention to him. complying immediately, I felt his fingertips trace my arse and core.  
“Severusssssss” I moaned loudly.  
“What do you want Miss Granger?” he asked, silky.  
“You in me, please Severus” I replied quickly  
“As you wish”  
I felt him line up with my entrance and -

~~~~

My alarm was blaring, looking at my bedside table I saw the time. 11:23. Shit, shit, shit I thought, how had they let me sleep in this long !? I scurried out of bed and was immediately hit with regret. My head felt as if a bomb had been detonated in it. Oh bollock's. Last night. Kissing Malfoy. Shit. Hermione get a grip, I told myself mentally, find your hangover potions. Reaching into the open -when had I opened that?- Draw of my bedside cabinet I found all my potions gone. Ah. So that’s why the draw is open and why they let me sleep. The slimy bastards. Resigning myself to the headache and the fact I was certain to be late to transfiguration I dressed as quickly as I could. 

I half-ran through the corridors in the direction of transfiguration. As I reached the door, I checked my watch one last time before entering, 11:47 it read. Sighing I opened the door and entered the room.  
“ I'm sorry for my lateness professor,” I said meekly  
“We’ll discuss it tomorrow Miss granger. Sit down,” replied McGonagall. 

A few glances passed my way as I sunk into my seat. She had been late for a lesson again. I caught Harry and Ron looking at her with shock. Sighing I tuned into McGonagall's lecture on transfiguration theory and its application in advanced charms for the household. 

The rest of the day had been uneventful, and before I knew it, it was 5pm. My head pounded as I made my way down to Professor Snape’s office for my weekly lesson. The reality about what had happened yesterday started to sink in. The fact I and Draco had snogged each other like 15-year-olds last night made me feel nauseous. Why had I allowed him to do that exactly? Was I actually insane? 

I knocked on the door to Professor Snape's office still berating myself for my actions.  
“Enter” is called by Snape from within.  
Opening the door, I was confronted with the power dynamic between Snape and Malfoy. Snape was sitting behind his mahogany desk glaring at Draco through his long dark fringe. Following his gaze, I saw Draco, standing at the other side of the office, a light red tint to his cheeks. Hermione could only guess at what the topic of discussion had been before her arrival, but she was willing to bet it something to do with the information Snape had shared with her yesterday.  
“Thank you for joining us, Miss Granger. I was beginning to think you had gotten lost” Snape sneered at her.  
Taking a seat in the armchair closest to the chair she spared a glance towards Draco who had come to stand behind the chair next to her.  
“Today you will be working together to come up with an individual thesis which the other will write their final essay on. You must provide at least 15 references which the other can utilise as an originating point for the chosen topic.” he glared at me and Malfoy. “ I have other places to be tonight, however, I do expect for you to stay within this office to complete the work. If I find either of you outside of this office, work completed or not, you will not appreciate the consequences” he sneered at them.

Professor Snape rose and looked at them again. With his robes billowing behind him he fled the room without another word. I chanced a look at Draco, at some point during Snape's mini lecture he had sat down in the armchair. Neither of them spoke. 

Pulling out my notepad and pen I let ideas race through my mind. Maybe I could have him work on the application of Felix felicis in combat situations and if it had potential to boost the user's skill. Hmm. He certainly will have to apply himself if he wants to successfully investigate that title. 

“Granger will you stop drooling whilst you think it's incredibly unattractive even for a mudblood” stated Malfoy  
Snapping my neck around to face him I saw a smirk plastered across his face.  
“I’m back to being just Mudblood now am I? I'm disappointed Malfoy, I thought you took your insults seriously” I replied whilst giving a cold smile.  
Draco sneered at me. “Oh, piss off Granger, I don't really care what you think”  
“You don't? Could have fooled me last night”  
“Is that so Granger? I would watch your mouth if I was you”  
“Why's that then Malfoy, what exactly are you going to do?”  
Malfoy didn't reply. 

Returning my attention to listing possible sources Draco could use I felt his eyes on me.  
“what do you want Malfoy”  
“Why didn't you stop me last night?”  
“Why didn't you?”  
He sighed.  
“This isn't a game Granger, you really should stay away”  
“Whys that then?  
He sighed again.  
“I'm not a case study Granger, stop trying to analyse me.”  
I just looked at him, not quite sure what to say. The boy before me seemed to change in mood every five minutes and I wasn't quite sure I wanted to provoke another verbal attack. I turned back to my work.

“I'm sorry for what I said last night Granger,” he said eventually.  
“It's fine, its nothing I haven't heard before” I replied truthfully  
It was apparently his turn to study me. His gaze remained on me for several minutes. He stood from his chair and came to stand in front of my chair. Gulping I tried my hardest to remain calm and in control.  
“Granger look at me”  
Glancing up I saw this vulnerability in his eyes. He was like a child who had been repeatedly told that nothing they did was good enough. I also registered the desperation within his eyes.

The boy before me looked younger than I had ever seen him. He looked lost and hurt. Like a puppy that had been kicked. But here he stood before her, and despite the story, his eyes told her she couldn't trust this boy.  
His knees bent so that their faces were on the same level. I gulped again, instantly recognising where this was going. What was wrong with this boy. Malfoy leant towards me and our lips met. His arms placed either side of my head and deepened the kiss, attempting to gain entrance into my mouth to assert his dominance. Quickly running the outcomes of this situation through my head I allowed him access. I realised he smelt of dust and darkness, which was an unappealing scent. I reciprocated the kiss as much as I dared without touching him. After what seemed like an eternity Draco pulled away from me.  
He studied me again. 

“Granger I need your help”

\----------

Snape did not return until gone midnight. Draco and I were beginning to think he wasn't going to return until the morning. I knew my friends would be their usual moaning selves in the morning and would likely lecture me on missing my own party, but when I was there like last night I was ignored. On Snape's arrival back into the office, he looked between Draco and me as if to determine we hadn't left. 

“Hand over the work you have done,” he said.  
Passing him the work she has managed to complete I allowed myself to look straight into his eyes, tempting him to probe my mind. The second he entered my head I was aware. He was quick and quiet, and probably quite easy to miss if you weren't trying to notice his presence. I felt him going through my memories regarding Draco. I saw the approval in his eyes, which I could only assume was in regard to my successful attempts to monitor Draco's actions. 

Breaking the eye contact, he turned to Draco to accept his work. Draco didn't meet Snape's eyes.  
“I shall inform you of your topic by Monday morning at the latest. You may leave now”

She picked up her satchel and swept out of the room wanting nothing but her bed and a lie-in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys,  
> I hope you are enjoying this so far, it would be really nice if you could comment any criticism or questions below. I would love to hear from you all as I’m worried no one is enjoying this fic. 
> 
> I’m thinking about doing a part of the fic from Draco’s POV and every chapters going to the future to foreshadow events. How would we feel about that?
> 
> P.s for future reference ——— means a break in time and ~~~~ shows the ending of a dream


	5. The Dazed Lion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No specific warnings for this one. hope you enjoy :)

It was only once I was stood the other side of my head of houses door did I realise I wasn’t quite sure what McGonagall was going to say to me. Did she know about the headmasters' request? Was it simply my reoccurring lateness that prompted her request for me to come to her office?  
Resigning my self to the fact I wouldn’t know unless I actually entered the room, I knocked on the door.  
“Come in” shouted McGonagall   
I opened the door and looked around the office, it was not somewhere I had ever been required to visit. Unlike Snape’s office, McGonagall had windows overlooking the grounds and photos of Gryffindor’s quidditch teams each year. Instead of the armchairs, her head of house seemed to prefer a simple oak chair without armrests.   
“Ah miss granger, I’m glad it was you. I was concerned it was going to be Filch regarding poor behaviour” McGonagall said with a half-smile “please take a seat, Miss Granger”   
Sitting across from McGonagall made me appreciate the fact the women had aged since my first year, and yet she was still as formidable as ever.   
“How are you, Hermione?” She questioned with what seemed genuine concern.  
“I’m fine thank you professor” I replied tentatively, unsure if my answer was going to sway the topic of conversation my head of house chose.   
“The headmaster wanted me to talk to regarding your conversation with Professor Snape. Hermione, you do not have to agree to what was proposed but you must be aware of why it is being asked off you. I know you are aware of the order of the Phoenix, and some of the members of the organisation. Your relationship with Mr Potter and your talent for magic makes you an important player within this war. Therefore the headmaster would like to utilise these powers to help the war effort” my head of house stated.  
I nodded at her words, knowing that my induction to the order was likely to happen after I reached 18.   
“If you choose to join the order, you would be inducted over the Yule holidays. Hermione, I must stress to you that you cannot share your role within the order with anyone. Especially not Mr Potter or Mr Weasley. Within the order itself, you should avoid speaking on what your task is. Due to the nature of your task and the fact you will be a student within this castle for the next two years, it’s my understanding you won’t be able to attend many meetings but it’s incredibly important you report anything of note to the headmaster. Do I make myself clear Hermione ?”   
I glanced down at my shoes, they had a slight scuff mark from my running over the last two days.   
“I think I understand professor” I replied faintly. Both her and Snape made it out to be my choice but it really wasn’t was it. I couldn’t exactly say no to joining the order and following my assignment could I ? Harry needed someone who would know what’s going on and was close enough to guide him, not watch him stab in the dark for the right way to react. I would do it for my best friend.   
“Well miss granger, I think you’ll make a wonderful addition to the Order of the Phoenix”   
——————————  
I slowly walked back to the common room. My brain was running a hundred miles an hour, what the fuck was I getting myself into. Being Harry’s friend was one thing but espionage wasn't something I had signed up for. Spying on a boy who has asked for my help feels wrong. How can I look him in the eye and comfort him, help him, when ultimately I will be the one to betray him.

How was betraying someone who reached out for her help going to help harry? It was blatantly clear that her life was expendable. Draco’s too. I sighed. The overwhelming feeling of fear was beginning to take over the rationality of my thinking. Rationally I knew that my life was worth less than Harrys, the prophecy had shown that. But the reality of that fact hurt more than anything else. Would I see the end of this war? How many of the people I know and love would? A tear threatened to escape from behind my facade. Showing emotions where anyone could see would invite questions I couldn't answer. 

I suddenly realised that in my emotional distress I had gone down too many floors. Cursing myself for the utter stupidity of this crap the headmaster has thrust upon me, I headed for the library. There was no way I could face Harry and the others in this state. Ginny would know something was wrong immediately. I needed to collect my thoughts before my presence was required by someone again. I was utterly alone in all of this. 

Upon reaching the library, I noticed the lack of students immediately. Even for a Saturday, the room was empty. Glancing around, I realised I was the only Gryffindor, which was honestly unsurprising. The dunderheads I call housemates were probably off causing trouble as always. Heading towards the restricted section, I spotted the telltale platinum blonde hair. Draco was seated out of the obvious view of other students within the library. He was surrounded by two towers of books on the dark arts. No wonder he was in the restricted section.   
”You want anything in particular Granger,” he whispered without looking up.   
”not really Draco, may I sit?”   
”suppose you should, Snape will happily kill the pair of us if he doesn't believe we have put enough effort into this fucking project”   
I giggled at that statement, despite it being utterly serious.   
Taking the seat facing him I pulled out my potions textbook and began to compile this week's notes to go into my index. I methodically worked through potions, runes and arithmancy. Working with Draco wasn't nearly as bad as I presumed it was going to be. The scratches on the parchment as he made notes were actually relaxing, I couldn't work out if this was because he was working on his own whim or due to the fact he wasn't pestering me with inane questions with simple answers. Working with Draco was peaceful. And yet her morals were outraged with her. How could she sit opposite someone who was beginning to trust her with ulterior motives? And yet here she was, luring Draco into a trap that would secure his own demise. 

I really need to stop the self-pity party I'm currently throwing myself. I noticed Draco begin to pack away his books and parchment into his bag.   
”Granger its dinner time”  
My eyes shoot up to meet his, analysing them for half a second I realise he isn't lying. Ah shit. Why am I constantly running late for everything?   
I haphazardly stuff my work into my bag under Draco’s steady watch.   
” I’ll see you around Granger” he muttered and strode off in the direction of the main hall.   
As I made to follow him I saw a black figure move behind the bookshelves. Great, as if this day couldn't get more complex.   
”Miss Granger meet me in my office immediately after dinner” he drawled as he made himself visible to me from his hiding spot. He spun on his heel and as quickly as he appeared he was gone from my view.   
How exactly did he want me to explain my absence? 

I headed towards the great hall, the corridors were deserted which showed just how late I was running to dinner. I really didn't want to have to listen to the complaints from Harry and Ron over my ’detention’ or the fact I was in the library all day. As the great hall drew closer my minimal hunger dissipated, despite having not eaten since breakfast. 

Upon entering the hall I realised I had more eyes glued on me than normal. God did these people have nothing better to do than speculate why I'm late for dinner. Spotting Harry and Ron sat with the rest of the group, I headed in their direction.   
”mione! There you are!” Ron exclaimed through a mouth full of food. The disgusting pig.   
I smiled at them as I sat down.  
”So Hermione, what McGonagall say?” Harry asked softly.   
”oh we just discussed the fact prefects are meant to be on time to lessons as role models for the school. ” I replied matter of factly, whilst helping myself to a chicken breast and roasted new potatoes   
” How come you didn't come back to the common room?” questioned Ginny.  
Suppressing the urge to roll my eyes at the girl I responded ” I needed to go to the library to do some work.” and then as an afterthought ”Professor Snape gave me detention for this evening for catching me in the library during mealtimes”   
A chain of boo’s and derogatory phrases aimed at Snape erupted from the table.   
”what a dick” muttered Neville. I gave the boy a self Pitying smile and resumed eating my meal. The rest of dinner was filled with gossip and further speculation on where Hagrid was. 

\-----------------------

The door to Professor Snape’s office was slightly ajar, and the low blue light I had come to associate with his office spilt out into the even darker corridor. I heard the scratching of a quill from inside the room. Plucking up all the courage I had, I pushed the door open and entered the office.   
”close the door Miss Granger” came from Snape who hadn't looked up from his stack of parchment which I guessed to be essays. After complying with his request I moved into the middle of the room.   
”I'm shocked to see you're already spying Miss Granger. Draco seems quiet, comfortable, around you.” he said.   
”yes, he's emotionally needy. He’s so far proving easy to cultivate a relationship with” I replied calmly, well inwardly cursing my whole traitorous life.   
”Hmmm, don’t trust what you see at face value Miss granger. He’s a boy who's seen things and done things you can't even imagine. He will betray you at any opportunity should you no longer be able to give him what he is seeking.”   
I nodded at him, trying to avoid the professor's eyes so he couldn't examine my feelings on betraying Draco.   
”Should I indulge every request he asks of me?”  
Snape sighed, ”Miss Granger, it's within your best interests to use every possible opportunity to aid Draco in his task. Your morals cannot affect your actions, as that will make you useless. You must not allow him to become aware of our… Relationship… Until the time is right.”  
I nodded at his response. It was what I had been expecting. Cold, clinical and removed were the winning attributes of this game. But was it a game I could play successfully? Could I really lie to everyone in my life about my role in this godforsaken war apart from the man across from me? If I survived until the end of this shit how would I cope with the actions I'm seemingly going to have to take. 

”Miss Granger, the headmaster would like you in his office on the 21st of December at 2 am. It's imperative no one knows where you are going and what you are going for. There are many things reliant on what is being asked of you. If you turn up, you must be willing to do what is asked of you without question. You are now a part of the headmaster's, ever-complex game of political chess.” 

\------

Snape's words left me in a state of hopelessness. How far would they ask me to go in the name of helping Harry and the war effort? Why was everything so bloody vague! I just wanted to know what I was getting into agreeing to play spy for the headmaster. They were asking me to make a decision whilst blind. How could I possibly know which was the right choice to make?


	6. Till death does part us,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so... Hermione is becoming Mrs Snape. Yes how shocking ahaha. Any Draco/Hermione shippers out there don't be too upset, it isn't the end of their interactions I promise ;)  
> As always Enjoy and any comments are always welcomed x

21st December 1996

I stood on the stairs overlooking the grounds. The carriages carrying my friends disappeared down the drive on their way to Hogsmeade Station, where the express would be waiting to take them back to London. After the attack on Katie, returning home to my parents seemed too reckless. I knew that outside of these walls, I wasn't safe. My blood status, friendship with Harry, and actions in the Ministry left me a blatant target. My parents were a target, and despite my pleas to Dumbledore, he wouldn't protect them. My only hope was to distance myself.  
Regardless, it wasn't as if I had any choice in where I spent my Christmas break. Obligations and prior engagements to fulfil and everything, how fucking bleak. It's ironic how the second Dumbledore realized that the turn turner had made me older, he made it public knowledge. Looking back on it, I scolded myself for not seeing what he was trying to do. The man couldn't stop scheming if he tried.  
I felt someone carefully touch my shoulder as if in comfort. Wheeling myself around, I was confronted with the sight of my head of house, her eyes told me the truth of how she felt. They seemed to age her decades.  
"Hermione, I was hoping you could join me for a spot of tea," the older woman asked, her voice laced with a tinge of unrest.  
Nodding, I followed her in the direction of her office. We walked through the silent halls, I recognized the fact this Christmas that even fewer students had elected to stay over the holidays. The portraits followed us through the castle probably, trying to decipher why a 6th-year prefect would be following the Deputy Headmistress towards her office.  
The last time Hermione had been here the older woman wanted to confirm her allegiance to the order of the phoenix. And, by extension, the role Dumbledore had engineered her to play. As the older woman opened the door and beckoned me in, it struck me for a moment that this conversation would probably be regarding the events of the coming week. My head of house analyzed me from her chair behind her desk.  
"Hermione, we need to discuss your inauguration into the order."  
I looked at her wearily knowing whatever she was going to say wouldn't be great.  
"as you know, Students of Hogwarts cannot be active members of the Order. However, given the role you are to be playing, it would be a mistake to not have you as a Member. It has been decided you will use your married name and middle name as well as a Glamour to conceal your involvement from the majority of the Order. To the Order, and Prying ears, you are to be known as Jane Snape. If anyone questions this you are to say you were a Ravenclaw who graduated in 1980. You knew of Severus during your school days but kept it quiet as you are not interested in the dark arts and joining he-who-must-not-be-named ranks. Hermione, it’s of the utmost importance that you tell the same story to everyone who asks."  
I nodded at the older women, realising that the headmaster had put some effort into this suicidal mission he was sending me on. Why was it more beneficial to have me publicly portrayed as Snape’s wife, I mused.  
“Hermione, I will collect you at 9pm on Christmas Eve. It would be... helpful... if you packed an overnight bag as you won’t be returning to your Dorm after the ceremony. I’m sure you knew that the marriage would have to be... consummated” she finished with a sense of disgust.  
Well, I could hardly blame her for being disgusted. I was going to have to shag my teacher after all.  
I offered the women a tentative smile, which she did not return.  
“Well Hermione, I will see you on Tuesday evening”  
Taking that as my cue to leave the room, I headed for my dorm. Dying sounded preferable.

—————  
The next few days were blurry at best. I stuck to my room, reading about the dark arts. If I was going to be able to keep up with the moody defence teacher and monitor Draco I would need to absorb as much information regarding the topic as humanly possible. Ever since I was given my task my devotion to the subject has grown, I knew what relied on my success in this mission. Being Draco’s trusted advisor would mean I couldn’t afford to be unable to provide him with answers. He needed to trust me explicitly and return to me. I had to ensure I could fulfil every request. Especially since the Katie incident in Hogsmeade. 

As 9pm approached, I stood in the common room in a baby blue blouse and black flare jeans. I had applied minimal Makeup, just enough to feel pretty but not enough to seem like I was making an effort. I had debated transfiguring a white dress but I didn’t think Minerva or Severus would see the funny side. I was glad it was empty, the younger members of the house who had stayed getting into unknown trouble in different parts of the castle. The silence was haunting in nature. God fuck my past self for being so anal about silence in the common room. 

Minerva entered the common room at 2 minutes to 9. Her hair was in a looser bun than normal but her face seemed to carry more stress. She was dressed in pale green wizards robes. She extended a half-smile to me.  
“Good evening Hermione. We are due in ten minutes so if you are reading to leave please follow me”  
I nodded and followed her retreating form through the portrait and down the corridor towards the main staircases. 

We weaved through the castle in the direction of the astrology tower. As we climbed the stairs to the top floor, I became more anxious regarding the situation. Was I dressed too casual, was I dressed too formal? Jesus I was definitely going to make a fool of myself.  
When we emerged onto the top floor I was confronted with a group of people. Dumbledore stood next to Snape and Professor Moody, the men seemingly engaged in a furious argument over an unknown topic. To the right of Moody stood Kingsley Shaklebolt and a woman I couldn’t place. Her and Kingsley seemed to be having a somewhat joyous conversation about what the holiday would entail for them. 

Upon noticing mine and Minerva's arrival Dumbledore silenced the two men next to him.  
“Welcome Miss Granger, I do hope the Yule season is treating you nicely,” the old man said with a lack of glimmer in his eyes.  
I gave him a polite nod in response, what could I say ‘oh yes Headmaster I’m so incredibly happy to be marrying my thirty-something Potion’s teacher’ fucking hell. Snape seemingly sniggered, which confirmed my theory he was reading my mind. Dumbledore also seemed to gain the glimmer back in his eyes.  
“Indeed Miss Granger,” he said.  
Scheming old bastard. 

“Well let’s get on with it then” grunted Moody “ I do have engagements after this Albus”  
“Ever the impatient Alastor, Miss Granger if you would” Dumbledore pointed to the space next to Snape. My legs willfully complying, I reluctantly headed over to Snape.  
“I welcome you all to the union of Mr Severus Snape and Miss Hermione Granger on the 24th of December 1996. The Ministry officials attending and authorising the union are Mr Alastor Moody and Mr Kingsley Shaklebolt. Acting as unofficial witnesses are Mrs Minerva Mcgonagall and Miss Emmeline Vance. I, Albus Dumbledore, will be the Bonder in this union. If Mr Snape and Miss Granger would like to intertwine hands the Ceremony May begin”  
Snape took my hand into his, I realised how small I was compared to him. His hand was slightly sweaty but not uncomfortably so.  
“Simply repeat when asked. We gather on the eve of yule to join these two individuals together as Husband and Wife. We wish them happiness, trust and good fortune within their marriage. Will you Severus take Hermione as your wife?”  
“I do” Snape muttered almost reluctantly.  
“Do you Hermione take Severus to be your husband?”  
I paused. Did I? I really didn’t have to do this. But I did though didn’t I. For whatever reason Dumbledore needed to ensure Harry and Snape could communicate ‘in the situation we can no longer reside here’ whatever that meant.  
‘I do’ I said Solemnly.  
Dumbledore beamed at us.  
“I now pronounce you Man and wife” 

The rest of the evening was a slight blur. The signing of paperwork to legalise our union was tedious at best. So when Minerva asked us to stand together for her to take a photo we both oddly obliged. Snape placed a hand in my shoulder and I stood as close to him as I dared with a slight smile on my face. I noticed Minerva took the photo with a muggle camera which she didn’t seem entirely comfortable with using. 

Kingsley and Emmeline were the first to depart, who were escorted out by Minerva who seemed relieved to be able to leave the gathering. Not long after, Dumbledore and Moody left for the hogshead to ‘celebrate a coming new year’. So they stood me and Severus on the top of the astronomy tower alone.  
“We should retire,” my new husband stated.  
I nodded in agreement, words would have failed me had I attempted to talk.  
He glided down the staircase and here I began my second trek through the castle of the evening. 

When we came into the entrance hall, Snape made for a staircase I had never seen before tucked off behind the main staircase. I followed him as we descended into the dungeons, the air getting colder with each descending step. When we finally reached the bottom of the steps I was confronted with two paths, I couldn’t imagine how the First years found his chambers. Maybe that was the point. We turned several corners until Snape just stopped in the middle of the hallway in front of what must have been a painting of the Hogwarts founders.  
“Nymphaeaceae” he muttered and the portrait swung open to reveal a decent-sized living room. Stepping into the room after Snape I noticed the fire was going and the windows looked out into the lake, the two light sources combining to give an odd grey hue to the room.  
His room was oddly personal, and yet devoid. The bookcases told a story most would miss, the overwhelming amount of Muggle books they contained shocked me. He had every edition of Charles Dickens, some I hadn’t even read. 

His black leather sofas acted like accessories to the large armchair next to the fireplace. Also black leather, it was decorated with large silver studs leading to a large ornate snake along the top. The snake had emerald’s for eyes, which reflected the firelight giving it the appearance it was almost alive. 

“The chair really isn’t my style but the room won’t let me move it.” came a voice from behind me. I spun around and found Snape stood next to one of two doors in the room. “You seem shocked by the rooms Miss Granger, were you expecting a torture chamber?” he asked snidely.  
“Of course not, I wasn't expecting the books though” I replied  
“Hmmm, yes they certainly are a contradiction of personality. Would you care for a drink?” he questioned.  
“I guess”  
He turned away from me and reached for two glasses, made of what I assumed to be crystal. He grabbed the bottle of firewhiskey and poured a larger than usual amount into both glasses.  
I nodded in thanks as he handed me the drink. The silence continued as we drank. 

‘I suppose Minerva spoke to you about the… requirements to complete the ceremony’ he questioned  
‘Yes, I was instructed to bring an overnight bag’  
This snarky statement was met with a quite genuine laugh from the man across from me.  
‘She would say that wouldn't she, the women hasn’t been near someone since the ’60s.’  
The pair of us broke into hysterical laughter, which was probably due to the alcohol we had consumed and the shared nerves. 

‘Could I use the bathroom?’ I asked tentatively. My request a mixture of wanting to get the evening over with and keeping him in relatively good spirits.  
He looked at me in pseudo-astonishment, and then laughed to himself. 'Of course, it's through the first door on the left and then the only door in there'  
I nodded at this information and followed his instructions. The first door led to a dimly lit bedroom. I assumed this must be his room, but as I hadn't investigated the other door next to this one, I couldn't tell. I crossed the room to the other door.  
His bathroom was more extravagant then I had expected. Tiled in the traditional Slytherin green, the room mixed well with the marble floor and silver fixtures. At the far end of the room, the floor merged upwards the bath which was adorned with a dozen silver taps. Fuck this bathroom is beautiful. I looked into the ornate silver mirror hanging above the complex sink in the middle of the room. My hair was slightly more dishevelled then it had been a few hours ago when I had left the common room, and my lipstick had all but disappeared. Realising I should at least try and make some effort with the proceedings tonight, I fixed both aspects of the offending parts of my appearance. I then reached into my bad and changed into my nightgown.  
I felt sick to my stomach. Was I really going to sleep with my Teacher, a man twice my age? Merlin what had that stupid old man managed to get me to agree with. Manipulating Draco was one thing but Shagging Snape? And for what?  
Now isn't the time, I scolded myself. I could hardly go back on my actions now. Steeling myself for what was to inevitably come, I exited the bathroom. 

I was greeted to the sight of Snape in bed topless reading Kiss the Girls by James Patterson. Well, this man really was full of surprises.  
'Join me.'  
He hadn't even looked up from the book. Making my way across the room, I pulled back the covers and climbed into Snape's bed. We lay there in total silence. There wasn't even a clock to listen to.  
"Is the book good?" I questioned out of sheer boredom.  
Severus placed the book on the bed stand and turned to look at me, 'not as good as the first, but that's a common problem I feel'  
I nodded in agreement. His statement was fairly correct.  
He moved his right hand onto my hip and shifted himself closer to me.  
"I know we have to do this but if at any point you need a break just tell me," he uttered.  
Without waiting for a reaction he slid his hand to the hem of my nightgown, proceeding to play with the hem. He pulled the dress upwards and uncovered my whole lower half, before pulling the dress off completely. I lay completely bare before my professor. His eyes assessed my body, almost making notes whilst his hands glided down my sides. As soon as I had gotten used to the presence of his callous hands on my body they disappeared. I couldn't work out what he was doing until I heard fabric hit the ground. He placed his head in my shoulder and lined himself up with my entrance. As he slowly pushed himself in, his breathing became more laboured.  
He retained this slow pace as he continued to enter and leave me.  
Suddenly he sped up, thrusting faster and faster. He began panting his grip on my waist tightening. And then it was over, I felt his cum fill me. He removed himself from me, avoiding all eye-contact, and rolled over to face the bedside table.  
___________  
25th December 1996

He was gone when I woke. I glanced to the side of the bed he was occupying last night when I had fallen asleep. There wasn't even an indent in the mattress to signify he had even existed in the same space as me. I pulled myself into a sitting position and looked around his room. It shocked me to see the number of muggle photos that decorated his walls. On the far wall surrounding the window overlooking the Black lake, were photos of what must be the graduating Slytherin's during the year’s he’d taught. I could count 14 graduating classes. I hadn’t realised that he had been teaching that long. The dresser was covered with photographs of him and others. 

I slid out of his bed and walked over to the dresser to further inspect the photos. The first one that caught my eye was a photo of him and Harry’s mum. They looked around fourteen in the photo. It had clearly been taken during the holiday’s as they seemed to be in a muggle kitchen. Next to it was a photo of three boy’s. Severus in the middle, flanked by someone I didn't recognise. On the other side of Severus was a boy that looked remarkably like Sirius, they were all wearing their Slytherin robes and must have been around Eighteen. The middle photo showed a white-haired toddler playing with Severus in his living room. The child must have been Draco. They looked happier than I had ever known them; Severus caught off guard in a moment of pride and happiness, Draco relishing in Childhood ignorance. 

Finally, at the end of the dresser was a photo of a woman and a baby. It was in black and white with yellowing edges. In contrast to all the other frames on the dresser, this one was battered and seemed to be broken in the top left corner. The women seemed to be a prettier version of Severus, with pin-straight hair and a dainty nose. 

His bedroom shocked me. It was so oddly personal. The attachment to others clung to the room, it was like I had walked into a part of him he locks away from the world. It almost felt wrong to be in here. I quickly searched for my bag, I needed a shower and I wasn’t going to take one in Severus’s rooms. 

I dressed quickly and headed for the door to the living room. It was also deserted. He must have gone out early; probably for the best, I thought. I doubt he will be feeling amazing about having a teenage bride. I glanced around his living room one last time before exiting the room into the main hallway leading back to the entranceway. 

As I rounded the corner I was confronted by my husband and Draco engaged in a heated discussion. I noticed both sets of eyes focus on me. Ah shit. 

I continued walking as if I wasn’t aware they were even taking up space on the opposite wall. I could feel Draco’s eyes on my back as I put more distance between myself and the pair. 

I rushed back to Gryffindor tower in an attempt to ensure Draco wouldn’t notice I hadn’t brushed my teeth and brushed my hair, it would raise more questions then I’m sure he already had. A shower sounded nice.

—————  
28th December 1996

He’d been watching me ever since he found me wandering the dungeons.  
Stalking my every move as if I was some sitting duck. Silently watching me from a distance waiting to strike. Evading him would be my best bet, it would probably grow his interest in me. If he wants a game of cat and mouse he can have one.  
Which is a lovely sentiment until he corners you on the 6th floor going to the library.  
“Granger. Why have you been avoiding me?” He snarled his facial expression somewhere between aggravated and proud. 

“I would never Malfoy, why would you think that?” I responded sweatily.  
His face soured, in the realisation, I could play the games just as well as he could. 

“We need to talk.” The boy replied. He grabbed my wrist and dragged me along the corridor. I accepted my fate, he certainly wouldn’t kill me. It would draw way too much attention to that dark mark on his arm. That, and he didn’t particularly have the stomach for murder. 

We were clearly heading for the 7th floor. Honestly, he was lucky there was no one in the corridors, us being so clearly friendly would have set the whole student body off. God, that would seriously blow my whole cover. 

We reached the room of requirement, Draco’s attention was completely on whatever he needed. God. He may not be a murderer but he was a sadist. A sadist with no witnesses. This would be interesting. 

The doors opened to reveal a moderately sized room. Modestly decorated in simple beiges with hints of pink and muted gold, it was a clear way to claim neutrality.

I studied the tall platinum-haired boy, the stress of his orders were clear. He no longer resembled the careless entitled boy of our youth. His eyes bore into me, a combination of pain and suffering was overwhelming present within. 

“Why were you in the dungeons, Granger? It’s hardly safe for you”  
“I wanted to go for a walk. I knew you were about so I decided why no explore, it’s not like there are many Slytherins about” I lied flawlessly  
“This isn’t a fucking game Granger. I won’t be able to save you if someone uses you as target practice!” He bellowed at me.  
“Who said I needed you to defend me? I’m perfectly capable of doing it myself!” I retorted, my composure slipping.  
“Bullshit Hermione. You don’t know what’s going on. You have no idea what is discussed in our common room. What is said in the dorms? They’d rape and murder you and take pride in doing so! Then what the fuck would Potter do? What would I do?” he shouted.  
I had never seen such a display of emotion from the boy. His facade was completely gone. 

And then his lips crashed on to mine. His arms were pulling me closer to his body. I entangled my Hands in his hair as he snogged me like death was near. I worked at the buttons of his simple white oxford, Eager to remove the articles of clothing separating us. 

His hands roamed my body, in his attempts to learn my body. My top was the first to go, as his attention turned to my breasts. His shirt followed soon after. As more clothing was removed I became aware he was moving us in the direction of the writing desk in the corner of the room. 

As we reached the desk he spun me around. My back pressed against his chest, his mouth kissing at my shoulders. And then he bent me forward, to lean over the desk. Jesus, this boy had a gull. 

I felt his hands hook either side of my white knickers, as he slowly pulled them down exposing me completely to him. God this was more intimate than sex with my own husband, I thought. I heard ruffling from behind me. 

His dick slowly entered me. He was smaller than Severus, but from this angle I found myself being grateful for that. His hands moved back to my hips as he pumped in and out of me, his pace increasing in speed with each thrust. 

The boy moaned behind me, calling my name every time I arched into him. His grip tightened around my hips, to an almost painful extent. His moans became louder until he spilt his cum inside of me. 

We stayed entangled for several minutes, both panting at the exercise. 

As Draco left, a triumphant smirk spread across his face, my guilt enveloped me. The boy completely trusted me.  
—————  
31st December 1996

I chanced a look at my sullen husband as he sat by the fire drinking whiskey whilst maintaining a watch on the clock. When I had arrived in his chambers earlier he immediately seemed secluded and distant. The lack of snarky comments and degrading opinions made me feel uneasy. The silence was unnerving. 

I found his choice in glamour for me interesting. He had charmed my hair long and pin-straight in an obsidian black. My skin colour had been lightened from its normal tan to porcelain and paired with the deep chocolate brown eyes I would be unrecognisable by the order. If it wasn’t for the fact I looked 20 years older than my true age I would be tempted to keep the look permanently. I certainly looked the part of the potion master's wife. 

Severus had also given me a jet black cloak, not dissimilar to his teaching robes. They were embroidered with silver around the cuffs and hem in the pattern of snakes hissing, which sparkled when the glow of the fire hit them. At least my husband had taste. 

The clock on the mantelpiece struck Eight, and suddenly the silent man sprung into action. He downed his whisky and stood up in one motion.  
“Come” he uttered quietly and went to the door leading to the corridor. Assuming it was best to comply, I followed him into the dimly lit corridor. We walked side by side through the school until we reached the main entrance. 

Dinner had obviously run later than normal as we were suddenly in a thong of students. They all stopped in horror when they realised it was professor Snape and a woman. I smirked at one of the second year Hufflepuffs who looked ready to faint, either out of fear or shock. 

Severus grabbed my wrist, which I imagine to the impressionable students looked like us hand-holding. I’m sure he’ll love that I thought cynically. I realised we were heading for the main gates as we left the courtyard. I had, somewhat naively, assumed there would be a closer appertaining point. The cast-iron gates opened elegantly before us, and beyond these castle walls, I was Jane Snape. 

He turned to look at me the second we were past the wards of the castle and I felt the pull of apparition as we appeared at the Burrow. 

I looked up at the house containing some of my closest friends, in the window I saw Ginny watching the wards, waiting to see who arrived. I refocused on my husband, who was already halfway across the front lawn waiting for me with a despondent look on his face. I gracefully crossed the lawn and tucked my arm into his elbow, which was rewarded with a look of sheer surprise.

“We need to look the part dear” I whispered to him, he nodded slightly at me as if in reluctant agreement. 

As we neared the door into the house, Professor Lupin came out the door to confront us.  
“Who sent you to the whomping willow?” He asked accusingly with his wand trained on my husband's chest, Tonks stood behind him watching me with her wand half-drawn trained on my chest.  
“Black. Of the older variety,” my husband snarled.  
Lupin nodded, if possible the man looked even more run down then last year. He had aged at least 5 years since I had last seen him, with more scars littering his face.  
“Who is the woman Snape?” Lupin questioned, his accusatory tone still prevalent.  
“My wife,” Snape replied with a hint of adversity.

Lupin’s face twisted in confusion, he looked at a loss for words at my husband's words.  
“Jane Snape” I replied plainly, mimicking Snape’s teaching voice.  
Lupin looked even more shocked. A mix between distrust and astonishment. 

“Let them in Lupin.” Came a bark from inside the Burrow. Tonks led the way to the kitchen, where we saw the majority of the order collected together.  
McGonagall sat in an armchair next to Mrs Weasley and Dumbledore; who gave me a strange smile. 

Severus had pushed past me to essentially hid within the darkest corner, I knew following him was probably going to be my best chance at blending in I situated myself a few inches from my husband; which to the average onlooker would be inconspicuous, but would satisfy Severus’s request for ‘decorum’. 

Dumbledore cleared his throat. “Good evening. I’m aware I’ve had to pull you away from more joyous occasions. An eve of a new year always brings new life. I’m sure you have all noticed that we have a new face here tonight. I would like to introduce you all to Mrs Snape. Whilst you will not see much of her, consider her an ally. She holds a unique position.”  
The room was deadly silent. All eyes trained on me, trying to determine the value of Dumbledore’s words. 

I offered no response to these words or the glares being delivered to me. Let them fucking glare. I could sense the distrust in the air, aimed at me. Though if my intuition served me correctly Severus was hardly seen as a trustworthy character amongst the group. 

Dumbledore and Moody droned on about past death eater attacks and forthcoming missions to try to gain information about Voldermort's plans. It wasn’t until Dumbledore directly spoke to Remus that I pulled myself together. The scars on his face began to make sense, Dumbledore was sending him to the werewolves. Fucking bastard. No wonder he looked 10 years older than he truly is, I thought bitterly. And it seemed from the way Lupin was talking, the werewolves were becoming more and more Pro-Voldemort by the day. How pointless. 

As Dumbledore was moving to conclude the meeting, there was a commotion in the hall. Molly dashed out shouting about ‘stupid teenagers’ and the members of the order seemed to take this as their chance to leave. I kept my eyes tracked on Severus, knowing he wasn’t planning to wait for me. The room seemed to drain of people within seconds.  
‘Mrs Snape, a word if you will’  
I looked up to see Dumbledore's blue authoritative eyes fixed on me from the backdoor.  
I nodded, which seemed to be the new norm for me over the last few months and rose. I, somewhat eloquently, crossed the room to the ageing man and followed him out into the cold winter evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for this update taking so long, I really deliberated on the time skip due to writers block and other issues. The plot is One/two chapters behind right now so that's also a worry as this fic is probably going to be somewhere around 50 chapters already. I will foreworn however that I do have plans for the characters and plot and they probably aren't going to be positive. I'm sorry ;P  
> As always any feedback is welcomed


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